No Honours

Members of Welington Rugby Club have once more been missed from the Queen's New Year's Honours list. Officials have been secretly campaigning for their efforts in comedy on the rugby field this Season to be recognised.

Speaking to us earlier a spokesperson said: 'This is just ridiculous. In the past we have tried to pay for Honours, and never got anything, so we felt we would write to the Queen and asked for our efforts to be noticed. We made up the names of 25 Million people that we found on a disk in the street and wrote in on their behalf. We thought that that would have done the trick, but no, it did not'.

Wellington RFC now owe the Post Office millions.