Monday 7 January 2008

Place your bets for 2008

Despite 2007 being a bit of a dire write-off for many of Wivey's sporting hopes, the odds are defiantly optimistic for next year. Bookies are inviting punters to place their 2008 bets - whether canny or crazy.

Early odds suggest it could be a good year for Wivey punters. Tony Lockyer is the shortest odds with Bill Hill to have his 100th fight on the rugby pitch, at 1-7 - and 9-4 to attend casualty after the match.

After a year of reunions for the likes of the Spice Girls, Rocky and John Darlow appear to be the bookies' tips for a 2008 comeback - offering 6-1 that they will team up again. Meanwhile Omar Rawlings is just 3-1 to rejoin his former team mates in Wivey Ladies

The Queen is 150-1 to knight an Wivey 3rds teacher for services against insomnia - but just 16-1 to abdicate.

In less exalted social circles, Dolly the Sheep is 5-1 to marry a member of Wivey 2nds, though Will Hill do not seem to specify. Meanwhile Ladblokes are offering 4/1 on the axing of Bruce Keay's Wivey Messenger column or the chances of anyone reading it 400-1.

Other hopes of Wivey success include Baz Lockyer scooping one of the top Oscar prizes (7-2), Stuart Norman remaining silent for more than 2 seconds (20-1) and Tommy attending an entirely dry Wimbledon fortnight (50-1).

Rather more improbably, if Rob Aplin Ever scores a try, then punters could scoop a 250-1 windfall. The same odds are available if you find Daryl Smith awake in a pub after 9.30pm. At least this seems more credible than conclusive proof of the Loch Ness monster, a 500-1 longshot but you can get slightly less odds for seeing Pete Thompson out after 7.30pm.

Just as likely - or unlikely - according to the bookies are Wivey Ladies to have a number one single.

And at 1,000-1, Bill Hill are offering odds that Martin Broome shoots an advert for an anti-hairloss product, that Martina grows above 5ft tall or that the Archbishop of Canterbury confirms the Second Coming.

But now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to back Mike Phillips I reckon he has a decent outside chance of winning the Booker Prize at odds of (500,000-1) or is it a prize at Brookers?

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