Wivey Fireman Fight Pig Flu

I hear that Wivey Firemen were sent into the Bear to combat a suspected case of pig flu. I understand from a source that the bar was cordoned off whilst Andy Priest ate all of the Pork scratching whilst Daryl Smith and Neil Higgins went down into the cellar after the Smokey Bacon crisps emerging hours later.

A Spokesperson for the Fire Service praised their bravery " We are concerned about possible side effects especially after the Mexican Chilli they all had at the weekend"

Health experts have suggested that another possible outbreak in Brompton Ralph appears to be the widely-known P19-Luv strain, for which there is no cure.

The farmer a member of Wivey Young Farmers, who runs the farm told officials that his pig had seemed fine two nights ago, but was keen to point out that he had never had sex with her.